Name: Everything Wrong with Trendy Restaurants
Uploaded: 2017-12-21T06:54:01.000Z
Duration: 2 min 57 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

Hello, welcome to Pig&Salt. Have you guys been here before?

And I have a few things to explain to you.

We do small plate family-style tapas here

which means that all of our dishes are just tiny bite-sized amounts of food meant to be shared among 8 people.

So everyone only gets a half bite of the food?

No, someone will always eat more than their share.

Interesting. Now, tell me, are your dishes composed of  5 discrete bites of food,

like 5 scallops in a delicate tower of garnishes  for instance?

Yes, always 5 or some other prime number.

That's right. Although some of our dishes are just large bowls of sauce

which as you can imagine are hard to distribute on those tiny share plates.

So for those you'll just pass them back and forth 

or you can awkwardly sit and watch your partner eat while you wait.

Now, how many dished do you recommend for just the two of us?

Oh, it totally depends how hungry you are.

Although this tiny table will only fit 3.

Oh, actually most of our dishes are quite small.

As you can see the known supper, it's actually just a dewdrop served on an acorn.

Yes, there is one item on our menu that's fuckin' enormous

Alright, well, sounds like we have some decisions to make.

Well, before you do, I'd love to test your memory by rattling off  the specials.

We have 3 specials tonight, but you're not gonna be able to tell when I'm finished describing the first one and moving on to the second.

We're serving a bruised squid covered in kumquat pollen and Potocki mushroom broth

and ramps and andhovies and halibut in a lemon cream sauce.

Those are the first two. And then we also have a build-your-own dish which is fun at first.

That looks nice. Can I ask how much that is?

You can, but I'm goona think you're a cheapskate  if you don't end up ordering it.

Perfect. I think we might need a minute or two before we decide.

Great. Can we start you off with any drinks while you wait?

All of our drink are just classic cocktails with one weird liquor.

Woo... I'll have one of those and then googlebots are on my phone after you leave

And I will have the carafe of wine that inexplicably cost the same as a full bottle.

It's an excellent choice. I will be right back with them.

Oh, one last thing, will you bring out our dishes in a completely random order?

Of course. We will serve 4 dishes in rapid succession  and then salad at last.

If you want to watch more videos, click here.

And if you want to investigate the Spooky Ole McCreary House even your mom warned you not to, turn to page 87.

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Everything Wrong with Trendy Restaurants

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