Name: What Do You Do When Someone Criticizes Your English?
Uploaded: 2022-02-19T02:14:11.000Z
Duration: 11 min 37 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

Today I want to talk about receiving criticism.

Criticism is one of the hardest things to handle.

Because we want to be liked, we want to be accepted.

And we don't like to feel like we are not good enough.

And usually, when we receive criticism - and it doesn't matter if there is a

source of truth in it or not - a lot of times it hits us deep in a place

that sort of confirms our preconceived notion of us not being good enough.

This is a psychological pattern that hits most of the population

In fact, I talk a lot about the imposter syndrome on my podcast, and

I'm going to link to the episode below if you want to hear more about that.

So when we receive criticism, instead of just objectively considering it and

thinking whether or not it's right or what can you learn from it, it immediately

confirms our deepest fears and thoughts and feelings about not being good enough.

And especially when it comes to English, we're feeling like anyway our English

is not good enough cause we always compare it to our native language.

And of course, it's not going to feel good enough if you compare

Because you know, for most people, the first language is, you know,

so deeply rooted in them, and it's a part of their personality and

being that the second language will never be able to live up to it.

We don't need it to be, we need to create new space for the second language,

Now, I decided to make this video because a few days ago one of my students

And I wanted to share it with you, and what I said to her, one piece of advice.

I said a lot of things, but one thing that I said to her and to

other students, and I think a really great way to handle such situations.

So, what happened was that she received a comment from a native speaker, telling

her that based on the amount of work that she's investing in her English and

the time she has lived in the US, she should sound or speak better by now.

First of all, I categorize it as microaggression and a mild case

Because, you know, when you don't understand someone's journey and where

they come from, and you compare them to yourself - where you are the person

in power and you have the privilege of being born into English - and

you expect something from someone without having the experience of

having it yourself, I think it's very much detached and discriminatory.

Because you don't understand that people have different experiences,

different sounds, different Englishes, different colors, different

Not everyone is like you and not everyone needs to be and sound like you.

So that comment is irrelevant and insensitive.

And again, people with privilege don't know what it's like for people to learn a

second language, and to immerse themselves in a culture and in a language and in

So let's begin with the fact that if you haven't mastered a second language

and you're able to speak fluently in that language and clearly, you have

no right to criticize or comment on someone else's accent, pronunciation,

fluency, or level of English or whatever language they're speaking.

Because there are insensitive, entitled, rude people who will always have something

to say about other people's performance, especially people who they feel are not

Like what happened with my student and many other students of mine.

We can't control other people's actions, but we can control our reaction, our

emotional response, and our interpretation of what it is that they're saying.

Here's the problem with criticism and imposter syndrome.

When someone says something negative about something that you are so afraid

of and you believe that about yourself, what will end up happening is that

you will use it as a confirmation to prove to yourself that what you think

about yourself, your inner critic, the darkest part in you, is true.

Instead of saying, "That's not true" or "That's impossible" or "What is she

talking about?", you will say, "Oh, here.

This is proof that I'm not good enough, that my pronunciation is not good

enough, that I shouldn't be living here, or I don't deserve to live here

So, one, you need to remember that how you respond to it is very much subjective.

So what I would encourage you to do is to decide that you have, one - your

inner critic that will agree with, you know, feedback and criticism,

negative feedback and criticism, unhelpful feedback and criticism.

But don't forget that inside of you, you also have your

And your guardian is going to do whatever is possible in their power to protect you.

You can also think of it as your protector.

And when something happens that challenges you, you can choose who you want to hear

their voice -  your inner critic that will agree with it, or your guardian

Because again, we can't change them, and it's not our job to change them,

But it's your job to decide how you are going to respond to things, so

that you will keep on the right track and the right path to success, and not

When you receive feedback and you say, "Yes, it's true", and you

internalize it and you feel bad about it, you're actually agreeing with it.

Let's assume someone says, "How long have you lived here?

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What Do You Do When Someone Criticizes Your English?

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