Name: 10 Things Men Need To STOP doing in 2025
Uploaded: 2025-01-27T16:51:14.000Z
Duration: 31 min 13 s
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Alright men, welcome back to the Man Talks show.

Today we're going to be talking about the 10 things that you need to stop doing in 2025.

Now this is a list of things that have dramatically changed my own life and have changed the lives of the men that I have worked with.

I'm very fortunate in the sense that the clients that I get to work with are men that run hedge funds, that are Wall Street traders, they're some of the best in their industry, athletes, professional athletes from the NFL and NHL, rappers, musicians, heavy metal guitarists and drummers, guys that are real estate moguls and entrepreneurs in the tech world.

I really get to work with some of the elite top performing men and what I've noticed is that all of these men at some point have to stop doing these behaviors that are in this list.

And rather than doing some New Year's, new you, BS resolution that never works, that nobody ever follows through on, that I personally just legitimately dislike, I think it's garbage, these are the things that you can start to call out and cut out of your life that are going to make a dramatic, dramatic difference.

So number one, let's just dive straight into it and if you enjoy this, please don't forget to man it forward, share this with somebody in your life that you know will enjoy it, it goes a long way to growing the channel and supporting the work that we're doing but it also just goes a long way to supporting the men that are in your life.

So don't forget to man it forward, subscribe to the channel, like the video and let's dive in.

So number one, I can't say this any other way, stop shitting on yourself, stop shitting on yourself, stop brutally just like destroying yourself verbally in your head, punishing yourself every single time that you get something wrong, shaming yourself anytime that you don't live up to the unrealistic expectations that you have set for yourself, stop self-flagellating and self-punishing every single time something goes wrong.

Start taking what I call clean accountability.

This means no shaming yourself, no shaming yourself or punishing yourself when things go wrong, when you have messed up, when you have made a bad decision.

Now I say this because I've noticed a trend in a lot of men that I've worked with over the last decade and in myself, I used to beat the crap out of myself verbally in my head whenever I did anything wrong, whenever I didn't meet some unrealistic expectation I set for myself, I would lace into myself, what's wrong with you, you're such a POS, how could you do that, nobody else would get this wrong, you're so stupid, and I would just berate myself and in some ways I was trying to do that to leverage shame to try and propel me forward, to get better results.

Now this is a catch-22 because for some men, you might be one of the men like me where shame was crippling me and that self-punishment, that self-deprecation was the thing standing in my way.

Now there are men who are in a very different camp where they leverage that self-deprecation, they leverage their shame, they leverage what I call dark motivation, they punish themselves and whip themselves verbally, psychologically and emotionally in order to try and get results and it works for a period of time.

And this is the catch, all of the men that I have ever worked with that have used shame to motivate themselves, at some point that mechanism of shame-based motivation will start to work against them.

They'll start to not be able to perform, they'll get depressed, they will just genuinely loathe and hate themselves, they'll destroy relationships and push people away because they don't see that they're worthy, a whole bunch of things can happen.

So this year in 2025, start to take clean accountability.

This means no shaming, no judgment of yourself, just yeah, that was the wrong choice, that was a bad decision, that wasn't a smart decision for me to make in my life and take ownership over it.

And use that as a mechanism to propel you forward, use that clean accountability as a mechanism to help you change.

Number two, stop letting women, stop blaming women for all of your problems.

I've been on YouTube not for very long, I haven't been on YouTube for a super long time but I've been working with men for over a decade and what I've noticed on YouTube is that there is a very large subset of men who are convinced that every single problem in their life is the result of a woman's.

And there's a large subset of women who believe the same thing about men, right?

It's like the patriarchy is the sole problem with everything in existence today and every issue can be traced back to men.

So I get it, I get that maybe you are a man who has been screwed over by a woman, maybe you were betrayed, maybe you were cheated on, maybe you were hurt by a woman, maybe she divorced you and took half of everything that you earn and own, maybe she won't let you access your kids.

I get that there are genuinely women out there who are brutal to men and maybe you've been on the receiving end of that.

That still does not warrant and justify seeing women as the enemy writ large for every single problem in your life or every single problem for men in the world.

And so this is really about taking your own level of potency and power back because whenever we villainize the opposing sex and we say that they are responsible for all of our woes, all of our problems, we move into a victimhood position.

Now you may have been victimized by women, abused by women physically, taken advantage of by women physically.

So I'm not saying that that's not a real thing and I do not ever want to downplay that that's a very real thing that a lot of men experience and for the most part that's not what a lot of men are going through.

What a lot of men are going through is they're pissed at women.

They don't think that they can get the women that they want and so they're projecting a tremendous amount of vitriol and resentment and hostility towards women and acting like the victim to women.

I can't get the job that I want because of women.

I'll never be able to make women happy and women become the sort of embodiment of a man's perfectionism, a man's relationship with his own perfectionism and he can never get it right with his own perfectionism because he can never meet his own expectations and for some men they project that out on to women.

You're always going to betray me and what it does is create a not just a victim orientation within your mind and your mindset but it allows you to stay lonely and isolated and disconnected from women because you just see them as one way.

You just see women as a problem or as dysfunctional or as all entitled and you never actually meet the woman that's in front of you because you're just interacting with the perception that you hold of women that's being projected on to her.

So stop blaming women for all your problems and start to get to know the women that are actually in your life that you meet whether it's at the coffee shop or the gym or the grocery store or at the yoga studio or wherever it is that you go at work.

Start to genuinely get to know them and get to know that individual woman rather than projecting your animosity and vitriol towards women at large on to every single woman that you meet.

Number three, stop tuning in to calorie list content.

Stop tuning into the thirst traps, delete your OnlyFans account if you have one, unfollow all the women on Instagram or TikTok that you follow that you know are just a waste of time that are just getting your attention for free, getting your follow and all your likes and all your comments and all your time and attention and your imagination is going towards them.

Stop wasting your time on content that is not nourishing your mind, that's not helping you to develop into the man, the leader, the husband, the partner, the father that you ultimately want to be.

Start to consume valuable content that is designed specifically for the sole purpose of supporting you on the mission that you are on.

Whatever that mission is, maybe you want to make a million dollars next year.

Maybe you just want to enter into the workforce and get a good job.

Maybe you want to have an extraordinary relationship or a really great sex life or whatever it is.

Maybe you want to be an extraordinary father.

Start to consume the type of content that is going to help you reach your goal and attack your mission.

That might mean that you have to unfollow people, might mean that you have to go off of social media for a while, but really take a look at the content.

Maybe you're only listening to certain podcasts and you need to broaden your podcast listening.

Maybe there's some books that you actually need to read and not just consume content but actually dive back into some books.

So stop consuming calorie-less content and start consuming content that is going to support you in reaching your goals.

Number four, stop ignoring your finances.

I cannot tell you how many men I have worked with over the years who use avoidance as their main tool and tactic when it comes to their finances.

You ask them how things are going financially, how much do you have saved, where's your debt at, how much is your monthly burn, and they're not able to give you any information.

I felt insecure about money, I was terribly broke, I was in debt, I was like the ramen noodle dude.

I used to make this, oh man, I'm going to get so much flack for this if you're watching this or listening to this.

But in university I was so broke that I would make stir fry with lunch meat because I didn't have enough money to buy real chicken breasts or I didn't have enough money to buy steaks and that type of meat.

And so I would make this stir fry, I remember dating this woman in university and I made it for her one time and she was like, what is this?

But part of that was that I was just in complete avoidance of my money situation.

I did not want to look at it at all because I was broke, I was in debt, I didn't know how to save money, I didn't know how to invest money, I didn't know what the hell an ETF fund was or a Roth IRA or a tax-free savings account.

I didn't know what any of those things were.

And so I used avoidance as a tool and tactic for my finances.

So start to educate yourself in 2025 about money, about how to save, how to invest, how to earn more money, maybe how to have passive income, whatever that is, just start to level up your relationship to money so that you're not avoiding some of the hard parts.

You should be able to get to a point where you are running your personal finances like a business, where you have a P&L statement for your personal finances on a monthly, quarterly and annual basis so that you can see the breakdown of how much money is coming in, where is that money going to, how much money is being saved, where is it being invested and how are those investments doing.

That's the basic breakdown for finances that no one taught me, that I wish someone had sat down, one of my parents, my mom was a banker, she probably could have done that at some point.

But somebody had sat me down and said, here's how money works and operates, here's the basics of it and we're going to help you to learn how to invest.

But it's one of the things that has radically changed my life.

When I prioritized my finances, I started earning more, I started not just earning and making more but I started to save more, I paid off my debt pretty quickly so I got entirely debt free which felt amazing even though I made some sacrifices along the way.

I remember at one point, I don't know, I think it was like 2014, I was going to invest, I think it was like 10 grand into Tesla.

And I didn't do it because at the time, I didn't know anything about stock trading, I thought it would be a good idea to buy Tesla stock, I think it was at like 20 bucks at the time or something ridiculous like that or like $42.

But I had all of this credit card debt and I'd been carrying that credit card debt for a long time and I just made a decision to pay down the credit card debt because I was on a mission, I had a goal, get rid of my debt.

I wasn't leveraging to buy stocks and making more revenue off of the stocks than I was on the cost to borrow the money, it wasn't good debt.

It was like 20% on a credit card that had like $25,000 on it, it was not good.

Now in hindsight, I wish I had bought the Tesla stock but I succeeded in my mission to pay off the debt and I'm really glad that I didn't gamble because I didn't know anything, I probably would have lost money, I would have been like the only dude that lost money on that stock.

So stop ignoring your finances, focus on them for 2025.

Number five is stop seeking validation from women, from external sources.

Now I call this stop outsourcing validation and start insourcing validation.

So what a lot of guys do because we're very external is they outsource validation, outsource the reinforcement of their own self-worth.

I'm not sure if I'm worthy, I'm not sure if I'm good enough, I'm not sure if I'm smart enough, I'm not sure if I'm attractive enough.